While in courtship, you know your intended spouse well enough to be willing and ready to marry him or her, however, the day you got married, you step up to a new level of knowing your spouse. You got married with the assurance that they are just perfect for you. You’ve made promises and entered a covenant with each other about how life will be fulfilling and exciting. Then somewhere along the line you find that this perfect person is not so perfect after all. They have some personality traits that you find absolutely I-R-R-I-T-A-T-I-N-G! He doesn’t put the toilet seat down, her make up and hair is all over the floor and has changed the color of the sheets, he doesn’t put his clothes in the laundry basket, she doesn’t cook that well, and the list goes on and on.
These things don’t make you love your spouse any less but they sometimes cause arguments between the two of you. Such things pose as a sore topic in your relationship; you never even get to resolve them because each time they come up, both of you begin a war of words with each other. Do you know that slowly but surely, the marital relationship is breaking down, when you allow such to be the norm in your home?
The enemy wants to ensure that there is some kind of contention between the both of you and if it is not treated, guess what happens – One day out of the blue, everybody explodes and begins to use words that they can never take back. Irritation is simply feeling annoyed, impatient, or slightly angry. Now what good can come out of that, when you allow it to linger?
Don’t allow anything you deem irritating ruin your beautiful relationship. Meditate on 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 which says, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres”.
When you allow yourself to remain irritated, it actually gives room to all things contrary to love (bitterness, resentment, etc) to spring up. I agree that they may not be easy to handle at first however you must make up your mind to work at your relationship, to be forbearing, to be understanding and to appreciate your spouse regardless of his or her habits, no matter how irritating they may be. One of the best ways to handle this is also through communicating effectively with each other. Take time to talk and when you do, ensure you are both in a good frame of mind to listen to each other and have a fruitful discussion. Ask the Holy Spirit to give you the right words to speak before you begin; and you will see how quickly and amicably things can be resolved.
God’s grace is always sufficient to keep the joy, peace and harmony in your home. Draw on His grace and get rid of irritation.