Who you are as a single lady or gentleman is a reflection of who you’ll be as a husband or wife. It’s up to you to be self-aware and tackle any habits or character traits that already is or could be problematic in your relationship NOW. No one has that responsibility but you; no one can change for you but you. Don’t just expect to be accepted you as you are and leave it there. While that is necessary, it’s also important to examine yourself and adjust accordingly to the observations, feedback, and input of your potential spouse ESPECIALLY if it’s a source of friction in your relationship.
If you are told about your lack of patience, you need to control your emotions, etc, don’t get defensive… Get proactive about changing for the better. Don’t watch these things negatively affect your relationship with your eyes wide open. Many wonder what the problem is while it’s staring at them in the face. Be quick about accepting responsibility and be quick about working on yourself before you get married.
Marriage won’t automatically make you a better person without your consent. And it’s wise not to spend your entire courtship season dealing with tension and friction; courtship should also be an enjoyable time of your life. It’s time to refresh your thinking and have the mentality that “the pathway to an enjoyable relationship and family life starts with me.” Say that out loud a number of times until it sinks deep?…Then behave accordingly.
Contrary to popular belief, you’re not supposed to spend your time and energy fighting and arguing in your marriage. The foundation laying period (courtship) is the opportunity to be serious about sorting things out so you can have a smooth sailing marriage. If you’re with someone who couldn’t care less about tackling friction points and would rather maintain a tension-filled and toxic relationship with you, hellooooo… RUN for YOUR life!
As always, seek counseling if you need it! Happy Monday.